It’s Thanksgiving week, so obviously it seems fitting to dedicate a blog to the things in my life I am thankful for. It’s been a tough year full of loss, but also wonderful moments in the year as well. I earned my Brazilian Jiu Jitsu black belt after almost 10 years of continuous daily training and competition in the sport. My husband and I finally found the time to go on our Honeymoon after a long-awaited year and a half of marriage. Both my niece on my side of the family and my husband’s first granddaughter on his side of the family turned 1 just a few short months ago. I witnessed both of our sides of the family reach new milestones in life. Our small gym doubled in size, had its ribbon cutting ceremony, and has really grown over this past year. I kept some great friends, made some new ones, and learned how to open up my heart more and let people in. I realized I trained at a gym that both pushed everyone and challenged everyone to make those newly earned belts hold high esteem rather than being doled out too easily, and that all the people who train there really do become like family. I lost my beloved family dogs at the beginning of the year, but a few short weeks ago, was fortunate to adopt the absolute sweetest and smartest puppy I have ever known. She has brought so much joy to my life, and I am so grateful for her love.
Every day, I get to wake up being married to the strongest, handsomest, kindest, most loving, and best man that I know. He helps get me through the hard times, the tragic times, and the times marred by loss and grief. He helps me to realize that anger is a fleeting emotion, struggles are temporary, no pain is forever, and that there are always greater things in life to work toward and that there is always a new day ahead. I’ve also been extremely fortunate in having my two brothers, the other thirds of our triplet set, and know I can always count on them if I need them or even just to have someone to talk to. I am not only grateful for my family, but for my husband’s as well, who have always shown be nothing but kindness and love throughout our almost 7 years together.
I think all of the difficult times this year has made me really appreciate all the good things in my life. I went from sadness and lamenting over the haggard ways I thought I looked as I aged, to simply being grateful that I have the opportunity to grow old in life as more and more people I know have their own lives cut short. I went from being heartbroken by the betrayals of people in my life to instead, appreciating the tried and true devoted friends that have always been by my side. I love that I can recognize that other people’s issues with me are none of my business, that it usually stems from a place of misery and resentment, and that my happy marriage and super sweet pup are a truly enviable existence in life. Most fairytale love stories are only fictional, but I was lucky enough to experience this in real life and that makes every Thanksgiving truly the best. I have said all my life how happy I was to be independent, but now that I have found that perfect person, I am truly the happiest I have ever been and it doesn’t even come close. My best friend, my partner, my lover, my other half, my soulmate.
I am thankful for all the mistakes I have made in life as well, for it taught me valuable lessons, no matter how hard or difficult those have been. I was devastated over the state of my knees, but I am truly thankful it is a physical issue and not a health issue impacting my longevity and quality of life. I am not riddled with an incurable disease, I’m just in pain in one part of my body. I’m thankful for things like stem cells, ice, collagen, hyaluronic acid, and good quality knee braces. And when I am finally old enough to receive that knee replacement, I will be exceptionally thankful at how far medicine has come. I am thankful to still have so much family near to us, and to have everyone over this holiday and see all of our loved ones. I am thankful that I love being in the kitchen and taking time to prepare a delicious meal. I am not thankful that I only have one oven and a small kitchen, but I am thankful that I am so organized and create a spreadsheet every year to prepare. And I kid, because I am very thankful to have a roof over my head and food on my table.
It’s no secret that the majority of my love revolves around fighting, Jiu Jitsu, and my Brazilian Jiu Jitsu gym, Schell Shock BJJ. I could not be more grateful to train at a gym that holds all of its members to a standard and keeps its name in high esteem. We just had belt promotions over the weekend, and everyone who received one truly earned it. They put in the time and effort and all of the hard work. Heck, even with me coming pretty much every day, usually multiple times a day, making the podium at every single major IBJJF event, winning MMA titles, and fighting professionally, it still took me just around 10 years to reach that goal. These belts are given with honor and certainty, and not just the person who shows up 2-3 times a week for a handful of years. I have so much faith in all of our competitors being able to hang with their peers at every tournament they enter. I am thankful and grateful to our lineage and affiliation, and all of the people I get to train with. Most of all, I am thankful to the integrity my professor (and husband) possesses, that he works hard, never cuts corners, treats everyone the same, sacrifices his time to be there for all, and thankful I get to learn from him every day.
It was a runaway train, every passenger’s nightmare. Brakes failed and a sharp turn just a mile ahead. And a woman screamed out–that set off the panic. People opening windows, shoving and crying, except one couple. Sitting across from each other, the gentleman in a black suit winked at the woman in red heels. He slowly smiled and stood, reaching his hand out to her, and whispered in her ear, “Vamos a BaLeR [bailar].” The passengers sat back down as the train hurled towards the steep turn. People were laughing now and clapping in time as the talented couple whirled up and down the aisle. The old train came off the wheels around that corner, but settled back on the tracks, to the cheers of all that continued on its way. Baby, my beautiful Mahogany, the train is already going too fast to stop. Let’s just dance.