Does this title offend you? Good, then we’re on the right track. In this day and age when every little word and phrase is under such intense scrutiny, it’s hard for people to fully express themselves without dealing with the repercussions. But in this glorious country where freedom of speech (not freedom of consequences is protected) too damn bad. You try so hard to be a good person and always do the right thing and yet there are so many people out there painting you as a villain regardless, and as tempting as it is to throw your hands in the air and just live up to that villainous role, you don’t, because deep down you still know what’s right and what’s wrong and will continue to persevere despite the trollops trying to bring you down. Sometimes, life’s circumstances are out of our control, and while we can’t always choose what happens to us or how people treat us, we can choose the ways in which we respond to each and every situation. I can’t allow another person to dictate how I feel. It is entirely up to me to ensure my own happiness and I absolutely refuse to dull my sparkle so that others may revel in being able to cast a shadow. I’m a fabulous, glittery bitch and I will reign down light and love everywhere I go (pretty sure this is a Disney quote).
When things are out of our control, it’s easy to place blame on every extenuating circumstances imaginable. But then I sit back and remember that there is not one person out there hating on the person sitting on their lazy asses glued to the couch. The more you do, the wider the net you cast to invite the admirers and naysayers alike. You just need to remember to not let irrelevant people live rent free inside of your head; they did not earn that spot. My rent is like a beachfront mansion on the west coast and I know damn well those heifers can’t even afford the down payment. The only people I will hold any weight in what they say or do are the people I hold near and dear to my heart and they are the only ones I will listen to when it comes to advice or critiques and anything in between. In life, we can always choose what path we take. I choose to take the high road because that is where the sun shines brightest. Y’all can keep shuffling down that dirt road and getting caked in mud and debris along the way. Personally, it’s not a good look and I am a firm believer in you reap what you sow and karma will always be a bigger bitch than I could ever be.
I am so fortunate to have a multitude of things to look forward to, and that is where my focus will lie. If losing a fight or complaining about discrepancies and other outside circumstances is the worst of your problems, consider yourself blessed. This has been one of the most difficult times in my life, physically and emotionally, but I persevered. My teammate and very dear friend almost lost his life in a catastrophic car wreck that we found out while warming up for my fight on Saturday, and that battle is harder than any I would ever face inside the octagon. I am so grateful he is still here with us and when we drove back from being out of town, the ICU was our first stop. The first thing he said when we walked in was that he wanted a picture with the champ and it was a privilege and an honor to be able to uphold his request. These are the important things in life. Not winning matches, getting hardware, pummeling those who deserve it, ignoring those who don’t, etc. It’s about spending time with those you love and creating memories. Pushing yourself to prevail when all the chips are stacked up against you, and continuing to hold your head up high when all you want to do is break down and cry. The world may give me a thousand reasons to break down and give up, but I will give them a million reasons to smile and keep on loving. Love doesn’t quit when the times get hard, but rather, learns to thrive in an environment where it was meant to be squandered. The love that flourishes will be the most beautiful love of all.
No one ever asks to be a role model, but often times we are put in positions that have younger eyes looking up to us more than we realize. We have people we have never even met watching our words and our actions and making up their own minds on the type of person we are. Whether this information is accurate or not doesn’t matter, people will always choose to believe what they want in the long run. The only thing ever accomplished by stooping to someone else’s level is a sore back and knees. A negative mind will never breed a positive life. The world doesn’t need any help showing someone’s true colors as the truth always reveals itself in the end. Silence is a beautiful thing when the opposition expects you to be enraged, and often times, it speaks a thousand times louder than the vitriol spewed forth from the loud and vile crowd anyways. We can not choose how others receive our energy. The majority of the time, they respond in ways reflective of themselves and personal things they are dealing with than the ways in which you meant it to be perceived. Inner peace begins when we no longer let others control our emotions.
I love me, and will forever remain unapologetic for doing so. I have worked so incredibly hard to get where I am and never settled for an easier road just to spare my sanity. If others want to hate me for my successes and what I achieve, then that’s on them and has zero reflection on who I am as a person, warrior, teammate, coach, parent, or competitor. I am comfortable with who I am and am proud of what I can survive and what I can do. I’m hoping one day that the rest of my innermost surroundings catch up to that, but it is not something I can force and must be organic and cohesive in its own right. I do not allow people in my life who will bring nothing but hatred, stress, and animosity, but I will always have my heart open and willing to embrace those I love, despite hurtful words and mistakes made, because in the end, things will always work out. Though I have both been burned by love and embraced by love, I will never stop doling it out, because the smallest words or actions can have the greatest impacts. Our feelings can honestly choke on an entire satchel of Richards (use synonyms to decipher the message), but I will still continue showering those I care about with love because they deserve it. Having my hand raised is nice, but having my heart raised is a thousand times more fulfilling. To those I love, I will sacrifice; my emotions, my heart, my time, and even my life. And to those wishing me ill will, don’t let karma hit ya where the good lord split ya. Wolf Queen-out. *drops mic*
