It’s that time of year again where the chalkboards come up, the first day pictures get taken, the little details get written down on the boards, including one small spot with the dreams for the future, the parents plead with their babies for one small, forced smile, and then they’re on their way out the door to the first day of school. We have so much social media shoved down our throats with the perfect Tik Tok moms and Instagram influencers making “get ready with me” reels with their children’s immaculate hairstyles and pristine outfits, that we get so inundated with how a perfect first day of school should look. We get so caught up with comparing ourselves to the lives of others, that we lose sight of reality and of the things that really matter. One glimpse of a seemingly picture perfect photo doesn’t show you the screaming match that took place beforehand. It doesn’t show you the under-appreciated stay at home mom and exhausted wife who’s husband barely acknowledges her existence anymore. It doesn’t show you the career driven woman who’s stressed out over an upcoming project at work and wonders if she’s going to impress her client or else be fired. It doesn’t show you the women riddled with anxiety over balancing a million different tasks and wondering how all of her financial burdens will be taken care of this month. Pictures are a facade of the reality hidden just beneath the surface layer of the photo.
You know what the parent of a child with special needs or one who is neurodivergent wants on that first day of school? While everyone else is clamoring for the picturesque hair and most aesthetically pleasing outfit choices, the only thing that they truly want and hope for, is that the other children are nice and welcoming to their child. It can be so difficult as a parent to send your baby off to school, and wonder if the other adults have spoken to their children about what it’s like to be different. That not all of us are the same and some of us may learn at a different pace or struggle with certain things and that it is perfectly okay. Many of us may look differently or behave in a way that others might not be accustomed to when things become a little overwhelming, but by explaining to your kids beforehand that sometimes people are a little bit different and that it’s nothing to be fearful of or ridicule or ostracize someone for, can go a long way with simply acceptance and friendship and gratitude. Often times, children aren’t acclimated to physical and emotional differences with others, and the lack of exposure can bring about a shocked reaction that can lead to unintentional outbursts or negative remarks and perceptible grievances. While they may not mean to be hurtful, what they don’t know can lead to saying hurtful things or acting in a way that can bring trauma to the recipient. If the only time children are ever exposed to those different from them is when they enter primary school, they have already developed well-established personalities.
Fortunately, places do exist where children can fraternize with others across all walks of life. I was able to visit a new gym that just opened up in the Cary/Morrisville area of North Carolina. ‘We Rock the Spectrum’ is a dedicated gym specifically targeted to foster safe nurturing, creativity, and play through sensory experiences in a fun environment for children all across the spectrum. There are sensory based toys and equipment for auditory processing and motor skills, suspended equipment and swings for vestibular treatment and balance, crash pads and trampolines for building muscle and core strength, indoor play structures for climbing, an arts and craft area, separate areas for teens or infants and toddlers, and even a calming area for if your little one gets overstimulated. A gym likes this promotes a great place for neurotypical and neurodiverse children to intermingle and play together, share toys, have fun, and generate a positive environment where everyone can feel safe being themselves. A place where parents can alleviate the tension and anxiety they often feel worrying about the judgmental stares they get from other adults when their child might act a little differently or a little bit louder than others are used to.
At We Rock the Spectrum, there is plenty of time allotted for ‘Open Play’ where all children can come in and play together. They also rent out the area to host birthday parties and different events. It’s so nice when communities come together and really embrace the ‘It takes a village’ mindset when it comes to raising children and helping families. All the parents and guardians in attendance at Open Play that day took turns helping out and watching the children play with one another and provide assistance in anyway that they could. In fact, I was truly touched at one point when one of the caretakers of one of the young girl’s in attendance told me this was the best she has ever done playing with others as she usually becomes too overstimulated. You truly saw the pride and happiness this woman had at watching someone she loved so much enjoy something every single child should get to experience; pure unadulterated joy at a gym. Almost every parent I know would do anything to be able to see that type of happiness and glee on their child’s face.
Remember, now that the school year has ramped up once again, it doesn’t hurt to give that gentle reminder to your kids that the unique differences that surround all of us is what helps to make the world such a beautiful and interesting place. At the end of the day, we all want to feel welcomed and included, even as adults. And it all starts with a simple hello, or a kind and small gesture, or a welcoming and all-inclusive gym like ‘We Rock the Spectrum’ where everyone is made to feel like they belong without being judged. These are the types of places that help make communities a better place to live, and the children of today the type of adults that will help make for a better future and a better world to live in. Kindness spreads like wildfire, and I after just a couple hours in that gym, I spent the rest of the day smiling from ear to ear. So many of us have been touched in some way or another by someone in our lives who falls somewhere on the spectrum, what better way to help spread that kindness than to rock it.
