Am That Bitch, Still That Bitch, Ahh.

Several people approached me at Master’s Worlds in Las Vegas a few weeks ago, asking for advice going into their matches on competition day, because of this blog right here. It’s crazy to me, because all I did was start a tiny little outlet for my words, and I am not a therapist in any sense of the word, but I was fortunate enough to be blessed with great recall memory, so I am able to regurgitate some of the best advice I have received in the hopes that it helps someone else. Life has brought me into contact with people of great wisdom, knowledge, and experience, and even some of the lessons I have learned have helped to cultivate these ‘knowledge bombs’ that I can offer. So after 2 college degrees, years of fight and competition experience, and many years writing for various publications, what does someone with my vast educational depth decide to recite as words of wisdom? While, none other than the eloquence of lyrics from Megan Thee Stallion: “I am that bitch, been that bitch, still that bitch. Ahh.” You see, Megan is wise beyond her years when it comes to believing in yourself. I offered this quote of advice to a number of different people, some who won and some who learned and some who accomplished things much bigger than a tournament medal, but all shared one thing in common. They were all strong ass women who more than deserved to be there, had worked hard as fuck up to that point, and no matter what the results would be, they earned the right to be confident. 

I am often told I am many things, some good, others not so much. But one thing I know for certain is I am honest, even to a fault. I say what I mean and I mean what I say and if you’re afraid of the truth, please don’t ask me what I think of something because I will most definitely tell you. Luckily, any of the amazing women who had approached me, did so with pure intent, because they knew the amount of time, hard work, and effort they had put in whilst preparing for such a major conquest. So why the fuck not would you not believe you’re a god damn savage? The results may not always be indicative of our talent, effort, and skills level, but you are never worse off for having put that time in to prepare regardless. I know there are days where we compete that one little mistake costs us the match, or we are too hesitant to the pull the trigger and we just don’t know why, or extenuating circumstances occur and we can’t seem to hone in on the proper head space and mental capacity. This does not make you a loser in any sense of the word, because sometimes it just isn’t out day, but patience wins out and one day we will reach those goals set for ourselves if we keep trying and putting in the effort.

I know there are days where it feels like we will never get better, and are in fact actually regressing, but this couldn’t be further from the truth. If you show up and put the time in, you are always making progress, no matter how insignificant or infinitesimal it may seem. Whether your competition record is nowhere near showing what you are actually capable of, or you are coming fresh off of your third world championship in a row, the people at your gym see all that training and work you are putting in and they definitely commend you. We couldn’t do it or achieve the levels of success that we do without our coaches, professors, and teammates. But I think most important to this at all is our support systems. Whether that be your spouse, family, or friends you have built a strong camaraderie with at the gym or in the Brazilian Jiu Jitsu community. Wins and losses come and go, but building and strengthening those bonds within the community is a reward that no competition can replace.

There was nothing that made me happier in Vegas than watching some of the strong, powerful, and badass women that I know and am lucky enough to call my friends absolutely kill it on the mats. Whether it was because I was watching them stare their anxieties and trepidations in the face and do what they came there to do anyway, or because they were rebounding from a previously hard year only to shut it down this year, I was trying my best to be at the forefront screaming my head off in support. I just want all of these gorgeous ladies to know that they truly are that bitch with a capital badass ‘B’. I am so serious. I have never been more inspired by the things I am watching people accomplish than I am at these major Jiu Jitsu events and tournaments and I find no accomplishment too small to be worthy of celebrating. My heart is so full at watching the ripple effects of excitement and happiness fill the most deserving of people.

Go out there this week with your head held high and know that you are more than capable of tackling all of life’s obstacles. Find solidarity and sanctuary in the wonderful people who support you, and believe them when they tell you how absolutely ready for this that you are. Women supporting women is one of the most captivating experiences I am fortunate enough to be able to be included in, and I will continue to try my hardest to be a part of this growing community of women who support each other and cheer each other on. No matter how many setbacks I face in the competitive circuit, I am going to continue to keep putting myself out there because I truly believe my time will come, and maybe what I am meant for is even bigger than competing. If there is only one person out there who didn’t give up because of me, then my presence in this community has been 100% more than worth it. Read this and know your worth, understand what you are truly capable of, and be that bitch all day long, 7 days a week, 365 days of the year. Ahh.