“Envy is Ignorance. Imitation is Suicide.”- Ralph Waldo Emerson.
“These bitches salty, they sodium. They Jelly, petroleum.”- Cardi B.
My mind can be a scary place. Why do we continue to put our best foot forward, smile in the face of adversity, and strive so hard to be a good person when the world just spits in your face and you have people actively cheering for your downfall? Why? What purpose does that serve? If it makes you feel better when someone else should fail, that speaks volumes about your character. Misery and bitter resentment are heavily laden on your demeanor and nothing positive can flourish from the depths of a soul so soaked with negativity. There are things to complain about in all facets of your life, but to the people who complain and moan nonstop, y’all need to chill. There are some people on my Facebook who every single comment and status update that they make is a complaint, a negative comment, or a post wallowing in self pity. This can’t be good for the mentality of those around us. Negative thinking attracts negative energy and even at only 28 years of age, I am so very sick of the negative bullshit. I’m not saying to run around being a positive Peter because I know we are human and sometimes we don’t have the best of days, but if there is a perpetual dark cloud following your mindset at any and every turn, get your Rihanna on and grab an umbrella.
I swear 2019 has been the year of people coming out the woodwork to cheer for my downfall and celebrate in my failures. If I had a dollar for every person who deleted and/or blocked me on all facets of social media, I’d at least be earning minimum wage. At first, this really grated on me and even brought me to tears a few times. After all, these people were all different, some didn’t even know each other, and I was the common denominator and the only linking variable in the equation. However, I did nothing to any of these people except live my best life. It turns out, some people are so resolute in their bitterness, that it kills them to see others so happy, especially when these people are finding success in areas in which they have faltered (such as with careers or relationships). Sometimes, people want to see you succeed, just not to do better than them, and sometimes people are so consumed with jealousy and envy that any time you are reaching new goals, it kills them inside. And should you have any missteps along the way, they find glee in your failures. But I refuse to dull my sparkle in order to placate the haters. I am a radiant and effervescent piece of glitter and my glow won’t be inhibited by forcing myself to sit in the shade of some overcast clouds.
I’m a noticer, and I pick up on subtleties. Don’t think I don’t know when someone removes me or doesn’t like me or excludes me from things. I do notice and it always stings. However, I don’t linger on these detrimental thoughts and I choose to keep grinding forward with my days. I am so incredibly busy that I just don’t have time to dwell on negativity; I literally have to use an excel spreadsheet and a day-to-day planner to keep my chaotic schedules organized and be as efficient with my time as possible. You a trifling ass hoe if you think I got time to pencil in wallowing in self pity. Whoever is trying to bring you down is already below you, and with as short as I am, y’all making yourselves the size of Thumbelina and I will forever retain that Chun Li attitude. You can’t let the opinions of others dictate your true behavior, but it takes a strong person to rise above the influx of hatred and vitriol venomous snakes will spew in your path. But at the end of the day, I am pursuing my dreams, I come home to the goodest dog, a nice house, and a DP that loves me with every fiber of his being. So the lonely and isolated people living a mundane life hindered by the fear of pursuing greatness will never get me down for long. At night they dream of the things I’m working towards in my waking hours. It’s easier to never try and not have to deal with the feelings of disappointment should you not succeed, but it will fill me with insurmountable regret to be on my deathbed one day and wonder ‘what if.’ I’d rather try and fail a million times than to be too afraid to take that risk and see what my potential truly is. And if they keep hating, they can honestly die mad.
Quit hating on people in their winning season, you don’t know what they lost in their losing season. The problem is that people look at those who are out there succeeding and getting after it and automatically assume it was an easy path devoid of all hardships. Some people choose to suffer in silence and not let their hiccups be an excuse for not striving to be better. Just because it was never audibly or physically vocalized, does not mean that person never dealt with anything that a person with less strength would have succumbed to. We all face problems, difficulties, and aversions. It’s just that some people will use that as a crutch and excuse to never having accomplished anything greater in life while others will use that as the fuel that ignites their soul on fire and pushes them to do more. I’m out here turning lemons into lemonade and adding some shots of vodka along the way to spice things up. I know for a fact that my partner has dealt with things that would have broken the strongest of men. He could have easily let any number of those hardships prevent him from achieving greatness. But like me with a mouth piece and my salivary medical condition, he spit on the faces of those blocking his path and began to build his empire. And you already know I was more than happy to take my place beside him on that throne and enmesh myself in that reign. Bow down.
I want those reading this who are encumbered by difficulties to keep pushing, and I want those who are thriving to enjoy it and occasionally reveal in their glory. Do not feel bad for accomplishing things others are too lazy, scared, or undisciplined to achieve. Be proud of yourself for all that you do because only you alone know what sacrifices and hard work it took to reach those levels. Start calling them haters Smuckers because they be so jelly and proceed to eat their criticisms for breakfast. 2019 has drawn almost to a close and my vision in 2020 (ha, get it) will be flawless and we leaving all those haters in the dust. They can waste the precious time they have on this earth seeking the downfall of others while we out here flourishing like a rose through the concrete. And if you need someone to applaud and cheer for you, reach out to me, because I will be your number one fan. There is nothing I admire more than go-getters and dream-chasers and on the flip side of that same coin, their is nothing I frown upon more than attention-seekers and excuse-makers. Do better, be better, and refuse to let your hindrances become permanent obstacles. It’s a damn shame my haters have removed me from social media because they are the ones who could benefit most from reading this and stop seething with envy at those living their best life. But if they happen to come across this blog in one way or another, just know that I’m waving at them from across the way, and a certain finger may be the only thing in the air when I do.
