I will not quit, not ever. In life, on the mats, in a fight, I won’t ever stop. All the eyes watching me, whether rooting for me or secretly (and sometimes not so secretly) hoping I fail, they will never see me give up. Either I finish and wind up victorious, or I lose after giving it my all, but the only time they will see me quit is if I die. You will have to physically drag my mangled and bleeding corpse if you want me to stop because this wolf doesn’t know the meaning of the word quit. We are lucky enough to be given one opportunity at life, so why not make the most of it? I don’t want to live my life never pushing myself to reach my maximum potential and being left with questions of ‘what if’s’ and doubts at the end of my life. I would be doing myself a tremendous injustice by not pushing beyond my limits and setting almost unreachable expectations. Spoiler alert, nothing worth having in life is easy. The majority of the population faces their own personal hoard of hardships and battles they must face daily, and the strong find ways to conquer them. I choose to believe in the little girl who thought anything she dreamt was possible if she tried hard enough, and who am I to let her down?
There are days that I doubt myself, collapsing into a sobbing heap on the floor questioning if I will ever be good enough. Screaming desperately into my pillows until my throat turns raw and my tears run dry and completely allowing myself a cathartic release. Once my moment of weakness excavates my soul, I figuratively pick myself up by the bootstraps and get ready to go to war with the world yet again. I need to remind myself that courage doesn’t always roar, sometimes it is the quiet voice at the end of the day that says I will try again tomorrow. It’s perfectly okay to fail sometimes, but what is not okay is to allow ourselves to fail because we became exhausted with the mental and physical anguish and effort and therefore give up on ourselves, and even worse, if we allow these failures to keep us from trying again. People remember the names of those who didn’t quit. Legendary heroes have failed time and time again but their names are spoken in reverence because they kept thriving and pushing forward and achieved greatness. Those great successes often eclipse the multitude of defeats, but it’s the attitude of the go-getters that people remember and therefore respect. Respect is a title that is always earned, never given, and every drop of sweat and ounce of tears will course and pulsate through my veins until I earn my place in this world.
It’s so easy for us to say that words don’t hurt us, but in actuality, hateful denigration on our character and our abilities pierce our hearts like daggers. It hurts to hear such things spoken in regards to our person, but it is up to us to remind ourselves that the opinions of small minded and unimportant people place no cadence in actuality. For every negative person hurling insults my way, I have 10 people in my corner proving them wrong. I know my worth. A cockroach may liken me to a scurrying raccoon foraging through trash as I navigate my talents, but deep down I am a g*d damn Queen fighting my way to the top and could and should care less about the un-creative derogatory remarks some trifling insignificant insect has to spew. Despite my current uncanny resemblance to a rabid raccoon (thank you hair that I am partially growing out forcing me to a near identical reincarnation of Davy Crockett), and the dark circles under my eyes from long days and hard nights, I know my nocturnal mammal days are only temporary. I will emerge a gallant, glittering unicorn and radiate sparkles from the heavens. Until then, enjoy the view, as hideous as it may be 🙂
This blog post is short; partially because I have an upcoming fight I am grinding tooth and nail for in training and I more or less feel like a turd floating in sewage for the most part while I rigorously push forward, and partly because I believe in short and sweet messages. Please don’t give up. Whatever you are going through, make a promise to yourself that you will keep going. You can cry, you can yell, you can puke, you can scream; just please don’t you dare quit. We owe the little voice inside of our heads of the shadow of the child we once were who would and did believe in anything that we also believe in ourselves. Even if you doubt that belief from time to time, there are others out there who feel the same way and they believe in you too. I believe in you. Pain is temporary, quitting is forever, and doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will. Age wrinkles the body, but quitting wrinkles the soul. I got this, and you got this and our mind will never convince our bodies that we can’t. Quitter? I hardly know her.
