I think that the older I get, and the more years that pass, the more that I truly appreciate my spouse and the friendship we share. While yes, I am extremely physically attracted to his appearance, (he’s a 10/10 and what I believe to be the most handsome man alive) and we have the fiery passion one associates with a strong, loving relationship, the aspect of our bond that I cherish the most is the friendship that we share. That is my partner, my companion, my confidante. Someone who I can vent to without judgment, and yet, also someone who will provide me the tough love and appropriate judgment if I do need it. Good news in my life? Immediately call my husband to ruminate and bask in the joy together. Anything that happens that upsets me? I also immediately contact my husband for support. Whether it is just to let me vent out my frustrations, or for him to calm me down, or even to give me sturdy advice to help ground me to reality. He is my safe place, and I love him so much for that.
I am rich; not necessarily in finances and monetary gain, but in happiness. I have noticed that one of my greatest joys in life is whenever my husband and I venture out to do anything. Whether it is a big vacation, small day trip, checking out a store, or trying a new restaurant, it is always a fun time. Even if wherever we go kind of sucks, it is fun because I am with my best friend, and the person that I get the most joy out of with anything that we do. Do you remember the excitement you felt as a kid whenever you had a sleepover with one of your best friends or went to a slumber party laughing and joking and having a good time all night long? I get to feel that pretty much nightly. Just the other day I accidentally slept in longer than I meant because I stayed up so late the previous night just laughing and having a good time with my husband. We weren’t drinking, or partying, or watching anything on Netflix. We were literally just hanging out on the couch with our beloved puppy and enjoying one another’s company. He helps me realize that while I still think it is most important to rely on yourself to be happy, it is the best feeling in the world when you have someone to add to that, and make it even better. You don’t need that person to create your happiness, but if you find the person that adds to it and brings out your best self, you are living the dream.
While I am exceptionally grateful for my girlfriends, and am a firm believer that a strong group of female friendships is vital to a happy life, I still consider my husband my best friend. I am super close with both of my triplet brothers, and talk to them all the time, but my husband is definitely my number one. While I share tons of secrets with my brothers, my one brother will even call to tell me something private, and says not to tell anyone, except John because he knows I will tell him anyway. They’re both married too, and totally understand how important it is to be totally transparent with your partner. I have always thought that communication is pivotal to a strong relationship, and this becomes more apparent every day. I am vulnerable with my feelings, and we always make sure to be open and honest communicating with one another. This is particularly important when one of us is upset with the other. Sometimes we both need to take a step back and re-evaluate, so that we can be as rational as possible discussing our grievances without resorting to derogatory statements or inflammatory language (which I know can be quite hard when you are especially incensed!)
Last night, I actually had a horrific nightmare where I was diagnosed terminally ill with only a couple weeks left to live. It was so realistic and left me so shook up, that when it woke me up at 4 in the morning, I couldn’t go back to sleep. In this dream, I was less upset about dying and way more heartbroken to not have the years to grow old with John. The only thing I cared about was being robbed of more time together, and it broke me. I know it was just a nightmare, and I immediately curled into his sleeping arms, and was able to calm down, but the rest of any sleeping that I did was pretty poor. It does make me think though, about what karmic retribution is so good to me that I was able to find the love of my life, and share this journey with my soulmate? Sometimes I worry about something awful happening just because it doesn’t seem fair that I get to be so happy, and be loved so unconditionally. But then John will gently (or quite firmly), remind me that thinking about these things will rob me of my sanity, deplete my happiness, and cause me unnecessary stress and anxiety. Sometimes I do hate it when he is right, which lucky for me, is quite often.
It’s wonderful to have a best friend you can come home to every night. One who shares similar hobbies and interests as you, but also has their own thing as well. Our personalities compliment each other so much, and we are always telling each other what a good team we make. He is the fearless extrovert, always making new friends and living life effortlessly. I am the meticulous planner who has worked hard at not isolating myself from others and trying to engage with people more (which he has helped with). I am still working on the whole “hugging” people thing, however. Our views on life and the major decisions that come up are very similar, which helps strengthen our bond, but we can also have differing opinions and meaningful discussions. I never saw myself getting married, so you know it really takes a truly incredible person to make that happen. All my best memories include him, and I am absolutely overjoyed at the thought of making more until the end of time. We constantly send each other memes, videos, and other tidbits throughout the day. I always joke that the stuff he sends me falls into 4 categories: Jiu Jitsu stuff, food stuff, relationship and love (super sweet/sappy) stuff, and of course, sexually inappropriate stuff. He keeps me laughing, keeps me happy, and makes me feel so beautiful and so loved every day. I eagerly await my best friend reading this blog post, and calling him later to talk about it.
