Thank You, Next

Positivity breeds positivity, and negative thinking tends to attract negative energy. It all sounds so simple, but I’m sure we know how difficult it can truly be to dig ourselves out of a rut of emotional gloom when we feel like a dark gray cloud is just constantly looming over us threatening a torrential downpour at an alarming rate. I once read somewhere that if you’re always thinking about red cars, then that’s all you will see on the road. But if you open your mind to the possibility of vehicular variety, you will notice many more cars on the road and not just of the crimson family. Sometimes we go through serious hardships that make it difficult for us to see a light at the end of the tunnel, and sometimes we don’t even know what puts us in a particular funk that we just can’t shake. I know combat athletes can sway all across the mood spectrum, especially with grueling weight cuts, arduous practices, and the thrills of victory or laborious agony of defeat. I have a few things that I am so lucky enough to be able to help pull me back from the edges of exasperation and trust me when I say I don’t take a single one of those for granted and I’d just like to express my gratitude.

First, let’s start with the fact that my partner has such incredible kids. Don’t think it has slipped my mind how grateful I am at the fact that they have not only accepted me into their lives as someone with no blood or familial relation, but that they love and care for me as well. I’ve heard so many horror stories about kids (especially teens) who loathe and despise their parent’s significant other, and it is such a relief that I have never suffered through such an experience. I never realized how much fuller my heart would be with them in my lives and it’s almost sad how much I miss them when they aren’t here. I seriously love spending time with the two of them and every time they express any love for me, my whole heart melts. Not only are his kids absolutely amazing, our dog is also the goodest boy. We took him with us camping this past weekend and watching him have the best day of his life was enough to inspire me to be like Cowboy and embrace each day with as much exuberance as he has chasing his tail in the wilderness. Something about coming home to a slobbery loving dog who is ecstatic to see you can cheer you up even on your most cumbersome of days.

Awesome kids and awesome dog notwithstanding, I also have a pretty dope partner. Who else can I adoringly play fight with at the house who will legitimately put me to sleep? (Note to self, stop picking ‘fights’ with burly bearded black belts ha.) He puts up with all my crap which is saying a lot and all I want to do in life is make him happy and proud of me. I admire so much of what he is able to do and accomplish and I strive to be more like him. He never lets things get to him, or if he does, he is very adept at pushing forward regardless without letting negativity impact him goals. Imagine being able to set forth and go after whatever you set your mind to and then reaching new heights and never doubting yourself. Apparently there is no real secret to doing that except for resiliency and determination and a stubborn belief in being able to take on any task. And then there’s me, who second guesses every action I take and always mentally beats myself up for not being perfect. I’m a work in progress I guess and I’ll just chalk it up to being much much much much less experienced in life due to the fact that I am much much much much younger. And all of you better appreciate by “subtle” geriatric jokes because I am certainly going to feel his wrath on the BJJ mats later when I am his uke ha.

I appreciate the hell out of having food on my table, a roof over my head, and a gym where I can release my daily stressors and frustrations. I’m privileged to be able to teach our 6 am classes, noon classes, and kids classes and our class sizes are growing day by day. I love my job and it makes me so happy to be able to pursue a career path doing something I so thoroughly enjoy. I also prep foods and create meal plans and recipes as a bit of a side hustle and I thoroughly enjoy being in the kitchen when I am not on the mats. I am fortunate enough to have amazing friends and such an incredible support system at the gym among my teammates, instructors, students, and coaches. I couldn’t imagine being miserable day in and day out just because I am “stuck” in a situation due to fear of stepping out of my comfort zone. A friend recently conveyed to me that you can’t make progress without patience, consistency, and a little bit of pain, and man, is that aforementioned statement so true. It definitely helps finding joy in the little things surrounding you in life. And if it doesn’t spark joy, pull a Marie Kondo and throw that shit away. Just saying.

In short, I’d just like to reiterate my level of appreciation for all the good I have in life. I am healthy, happy, and very well cared for. Every day I get to come home to my family and no matter what happens, I will always have so much love for all of them and I treasure all the happiness they have brought me. I hope I am able to gift them with even an ounce of all the joy they have brought me and I’ll make sure to keep trying to reach that goal every day. Find the things in life that help to alleviate any pain of the mundane stresses that occur. I hope anyone who trains Jiu Jitsu finds a gym that feels like family in the same way that I have and is surrounded by a team and coaches that believe in you and support you every step of the way. I also hope that those who pursue romantic relationships find a partner as amazing and as loving as the one I have (as well as several people in my gym as well who are also so incredibly in love with their other halves.) And I also hope the kids in people’s lives are as incredible sources of happiness and fulfillment as the ones in mine. Don’t sweat the small stuff, choose your battles wisely, reflect on all the good you have and trade your expectations for appreciation and the world changes immediately. If Ariana Grande can turn her failed relationships into a #1 song just by expressing gratitude for what she learned from her mistakes in love, then you can sure as hell appreciate every experience and lesson endured in life as well.

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