The world owes you nothing; it was here first. Nobody cares about your excuses, procrastinations, or laziness. Sometimes this can be absolutely brutal to hear, but it’s true. Good things do not come to those who wait, but to those who get up off their asses and go out there and get it. I found out recently that one of the kids I coach was heartbroken I lost my title fight, because in his words “I work so hard and have trained so much and deserved to win.” While it is true that I worked harder than I ever have before, this did not guarantee me a victory, and my ineptitude at sticking to the gameplay and not following my coaches orders led to my crushing defeat. All that hard work meant nothing if I couldn’t execute it when called upon and though the effort is not wasted because I will continue to call upon that training and fortitude going forward, it is a valuable lesson that we do not always get what we deserve, but rather, what we work correctly for.
It’s easy to play the victim in life. Ask absolutely anyone you know and come into contact with and they can list a multitude of downfalls, heartaches, bumps in the road, and negative circumstances that could have easily kept the weaker willed down and out. People are much stronger than we tend to give them credit for and most will rise up to life’s challenges and find ways to push forward, or at least to just survive, which is sometimes a victory in and of itself. However, there are people out there who exist who will blame everyone but themselves and list a variety of shortcomings that are not their fault. They choose to believe they are incapable of reaching levels of success because of the wrenches life has thrown in their course. Stop letting your feeble mind dictate your failures. It’s not that others succeed because they are luckier, many just work hard and refuse to give up.
It helps a lot when you’re stubborn and refuse to quit. I was told by many after my 5th knee surgery when I obliterated my ligaments that I wouldn’t ever be back in the cage. I had some people tell me after this last loss that maybe I should reconsider my career path. I even had some people mocking my effort. Well unfortunately for them, nothing drives me more intently than the want to try and prove people wrong. Also, if you have people in your inner circle who take joy in watching you fail, then they can go find another circle. I just turned 28 and I only want positivity moving forward. Life is way too short to be surrounded by “energy vampires.” I am not going to exhaust myself mentally by keeping people in my life who aren’t rooting for me, physically and emotionally. Life is much happier when you have a team pulling for you at every corner, and I think on that front I am doing very well.
We don’t always win at various tasks in life, but we can always feel like a winner when we give it our all. I have never felt more like a loser when I didn’t’ execute what I know I am capable of, but I will say due to the strong and loving people surrounding me, I rebounded fairly quickly. I also can’t express what being a role model means to me, especially for the kids I teach (who were the absolute sweetest to me after this fight) and the kids in my life who make me want to be a better person every day. I never want to be sad in front of them or have them see me give up, because it kills me whenever I see them sad. My partner is so incredibly hardworking and never backs down from any challenge life throws at him and I would be lying if I said I didn’t want to be just like him. Honestly, the world would be a better place if more of us were like John Schell, but I digress.
Victim mentality is such a pet peeve of mine. You are not at fault for getting put in shitty situations, but you are 100% at fault if you choose to permanently reside there. People trying to lose weight often want a magic weightloss pill, but that is not how it works. People in struggling circumstances must understand that no miracle pill exists in life either. You are stuck where you are because you are choosing to let life keep you down. Bad decision after bad decision just piles up and then you are teaching those growing up in your life that laziness is admirable and leeching off of others is a goal. It’s not. The most rewarding thing you can do is working hard towards a goal and one day reaching it. I have yet to reach my goal, but I will be damned if I ever stop trying. Life owes me nothing just for being driven, I must work hard every day and never stop pursuing my dreams.
You don’t get what you wish for, you get what you work for so go out and do something today that your future self will thank you for. Do not continue to play yourself as a victim in a war that no one is fighting. We are solely in charge of our own destiny, and though some of us may face more difficulty and hardships than others, everyone out there has battles they are trying to conquer and the truly successful ones are the people who refuse to back down. I may have been pummeled, but I never gave up on myself in that cage and I am absolutely the same way when it comes to my life. Either we drown beneath the crashing waves or we learn to swim powerfully with the current. Life does not owe me shit, but I will be damned if I don’t go out there and earn it regardless.
