Hot & Fresh Out the Kitchen

At what point do people looks past the money, the power, and the accolades in order to hold people accountable? Corruption exists everywhere, and boy, can it be daunting to be the sole person trying to point out that someone needs to be held liable for their actions. It’s unpopular to deviate from the crowd, but at what cost can you responsibly support someone or something without drawing to attention the transgressions at play? How many times in the history of this country, has someone skirted by the law because they possess immense skill when it comes to shooting a basket, throwing a ball, running some yards, or even arm barring someone with ease. Or how many times does someone with high prestige and affluence avoid serious punishment when it comes to breaking the law (affluenza anyone?) At least nowadays people are more inclined to take a stand when it comes to the court of public opinion, but still, if you are a person so well-loved in the public, it is clear your repercussions become much more diminutive.

I always think about the chaos surrounding Bill Cosby and his trial and accusations. Can you imagine being one (of the many, many) women he sexually assaulted, and feeling so isolated, hurt, and alone? Especially having to watch this “beloved” family man, known as “America’s dad,” on people’s televisions all across the country who was so universally adored and admired. And before anyone comes at me about his conviction being overturned, they should read up on the case. Over 60 women had come forward to document their stories after the bravery of just a few, and the statute of limitations was up on all but one of them. He admitted to it all, as he thought dosing them with the relaxant drug quaaludes and having his way with their bodies was not a crime. The reason he spilled the truth about his misdeeds was because the prosecution promised that he wouldn’t be charged if he gave honest testimony in the deposition regarding a different civil case, and after hearing all about his disgusting exploits, went after him regardless, which allowed his conviction to be overturned due to a technicality. So although he was originally charged and sentenced to 10 years in prison after admitting to all of his crimes and transgressions on tape, the technicality allowed the conviction to be overturned after 3 years as the ruling was deemed unconstitutional.

So many women were victims of his perverse and disgusting actions and behavior, and had to listen to most of America lauding the comedic actor and singing his praises for decades. There is no question of his guilt, as he admitted to it all, and yet, there are people, (such as his costar Phylicia Rashad), who will still support and commemorate that despicable man. And stuff like this happens all the time; he was just the example I chose to use. It happens with celebrities and it happens with people you know as well. People still supporting the movies an actor stars in simply because they like their work despite the horrific atrocities they have committed. Hollywood still giving them work when they should be blacklisted from it all. Musical artists still being supported because people find them attractive even though they should be in prison. Athletes who still help their teams sell out arenas when not only should they be delegated to the bench, let alone kicked off the team, but still retain their starting positions. Even Jiu Jitsu athletes selling out seminars or being invited to teach at major events despite their morally reprehensible actions. Or maybe even refusing to believe someone you thought you knew could be capable of such heinous acts. When do we begin to say enough is enough?

I am not saying we should all immediately cancel people for messing up. We are human beings, and all of us will mistakes and no single one of us is perfect. However, there is a vast difference between making a mistake, apologizing and owning up to it, than blatantly disregarding law and hurting others. Especially when infringing upon another person’s right to safety. When did blindly excusing sexual harassment and assault become the norm? When did people stop prioritizing the victims in the case and instead, aimed to spare the feelings and admonishment of the perpetrator? How long did. R. Kelly go unscathed, when the whole industry knew? P. Diddy? Rehabilitation and heartfelt apologies work for minor accidents and small mistakes, but purposeful instances need to face consequences. The consumer needs to make the decision to stop supporting people guilty of these acts. I do not care how talented a person is or how good their Jiu Jitsu might be, because at the end of the day I am the one who has to live with the choices I make and I am the one who could never sleep at night knowing I either definitively or indirectly supported a disgusting person. It may not be the popular choice, but it is the one that will help me sleep soundly at night knowing my heart is at peace.

Sometimes, people don’t want to believe the truth when it goes against everything they thought they knew of the person. Even when the truth is confronting them head on, practically slapping them in the face, they will try to ignore it. They may not want to lose out on the popularity of supporting said individual, or they don’t want to be ostracized for calling them out, or it is the unpopular choice to hold them accountable and they fear their own reputation being damaged. Either way, I think we should all take a long look in the mirror and decide for ourselves the kind of person we want to be. Is it the kind of person who forgives abusers who aren’t even sorry? Is is someone who victims blames and becomes a rape apologist? Is it someone who chooses to remain willfully ignorant because they believe the benefits of supporting said person far outweigh the consequences? Money talks apparently. Sometimes I think people turn a blind eye because they don’t want to be confronted with tough decisions and difficult choices. To me, the choice will never be difficult. I’d rather be universally hated for taking a stand and doing the right thing than universally loved for being a fraud who supports exactly what these people are; unadulterated criminals, and the absolute scum of this earth. I will always speak my truth, bringing it to you hot and fresh out the kitchen.